Papa's not home

Nearly 5 months since that fateful event last year that left Louis with a dislocated knee and 4 months since his surgery to reconstruct his torn ligaments, Louis is now doing well.

In fact, well enough to travel to London for a short trip this week.

Looking back at what seemed to be a long and arduous journey for him to reach this stage where he is able to walk somewhat normally without the support of any crutches feels like a miracle. Holding hands, walking together as a family with Faith in between us, whenever we are out never fails to bring a great sense of relief and wonderment for the both of us.

It was a painful experience for everyone in the family, especially for Louis. Yet, it has made us truly appreciate the simple things in life a great deal better.

Since about 3-4 weeks ago, Louis started walking without his crutches. It was all very delicate and cautious, of course. He started walking without crutches at home. Gaining sufficient confidence after, he went out for short distances without it. Starting with small, tentative steps, his gait now is more normal. He hardly hobbles. He looks more like one who is a slow, unhurried stroller. Going down stairs that are long or steep, he needs to hold onto something for support. However, its only a matter of time before he's back to walking normally, in his long, purposeful strides.

In fact, he started swimming in the last couple of weeks, swimming only free-style. The water definitely helps strengthen the leg muscles and the gentle pressure of the water actually helps to cushion any major impact on the legs.

After having him at home 24x7 for so many months, it feels a little different now that he's back at work full-time and even as I write this, hasn't been home for the last 2 nights. Its a short trip and I thought he would be back before I even had the chance to miss him. Yet, barely 12 hours after he left in the morning, I started to miss him. Similarly, he misses us at home too.

Before he left, he told Faith that he was going to go away and wouldn't be home at night for a few days and to look after mummy. Faith nodded sagely at him, seemingly understanding everything that he said.

It would be too much, I think, for a 2 year-old to fully grasp the concept of him going away on a business trip.

Ever since his marked progress in walking independently without any aid, one of Faith's final act among her slew of bedtime rituals would be to walk round to Louis' side of the bed. Lightly tugging his hand, she would pull him to sit up and say, "C'mon... sleep [with] Faith", meaning for Louis to follow and sleep next to her on the mattresses beside our bed.

Last night, she did her usual only to find that his side of the bed was empty. I told her again that Louis was not home and wouldn't be home for the next few nights. She would have to be a big girl in the meantime and learn to sleep on her own without her Papa lying next to her.

Obviously, Faith wasn't about to take what I said at face value and go sleep quietly on her own. There were lots of protest, begging, coaxing and the use of the magic word, "please", many times over to get me to go sleep with her. Unfortunately, I take a stronger stance on getting her to sleep independently :)

Actually, its sweet to see father and daughter lying next to each other and having Faith fall asleep like that. Louis certainly feels so and he being the putty that he is in his daughter's hands, would drag himself to the mattress on the floor when she comes along every night no matter how tired he was.

Come home soon, darling!

Pre-nursery registration

The rat race has begun... where parents, like it or not, get caught up about when and where to register and place their kids in some quasi formal education. From then onwards, the rat race never stops.

Technically, I think kindergarten is the start of pre-school. In Singapore's context, pre-school starts as early as the year kids turn 3 years old. We did our little "homework" late last year, recce-ing possible places for Faith's pre-nursery registration.

In the end, our very short shortlist was whittled down to Pat Schoolhouse and Chiltern House, in that order of preference. Even though we had set our sights on Pat Schoolhouse, like any KS Singaporean, we submitted our application for Chiltern house at the start of the year.

Couple of weeks ago, I had gotten a call from Chiltern. Faith was being offered the afternoon session at its Turf Club branch, meaning that lessons start from 2-5 pm daily. It was a no-brainer for us to reject the initial offer and asked to be placed on the waitlist.

Faith takes her afternoon nap daily anywhere from that time since she wakes up at about 9 am or thereabouts.

The afternoon session would mean that she would have to forego her sleep or sleep after she comes back from class. A kid without sleep equates a grouchy one and its bound to make dinner and the time before bedtime a trying one for everyone in the household. The other alternative of letting her sleep so late in the afternoon will yield either a night owl or again, a trying time for us to get her to sleep at her normal sleeping time.

Since we were still holding out for Pat schoolhouse's registration to start in Jun, Louis and I weren't too concerned about putting her on the waiting list. Chiltern was meant to be our fallback plan if she didn't get into Pat Schoolhouse.

On Tuesday, I received a call from Chiltern that they have now managed to place Faith for the morning session at Turf Club. Its the ideal time slot and branch that we wanted. IF we intended to put her at Chiltern. I asked for extra time to consider and haul butt in calling Pat Schoolhouse to check her chances.

If we were to give up on this prime slot at Chiltern, we wanted be a hundred percent certain that she is getting into Pat Schoolhouse. So, I called the school and spoke to the principal. The last time I spoke with her, she said they would call me in Jun when the registration starts.

I'm not sure if it was becos I sounded so keen on enrolling her for Pat Schoolhouse or the fact that I told them I had an offer from Chiltern, the principal said that if we are willing to register her now and make an initial deposit equivalent to a one month's school fees, then, Faith's got a confirmed place at Pat Schoolhouse.

I called Louis and we both decided that we'll go ahead with the payment to confirm her registration at Pat Schoolhouse. However, with the Influenza A alert, the school is also cautious about the number of parents dropping by its place without appointment. So, the principal and I agreed to contact each other via email for the submission of all necessary documents and to follow up with a cheque payment.

At least, we can now give up that space in Chiltern for someone else.

Truthfully, there's a part of me that can't quite bear the thought of sending my little one to pre-school. I know its a natural part of childhood and every kid's got to go through it. Who knows, maybe I'll be the one crying when I drop her off at the school gate next time.

Hmmm.... that's a sobering thought indeed! Eve, the clingy mom??!!!

Geez!

1st professional haircut

Two years, 4 weeks and 1 day.

That's how long it took before we finally give Faith a break from her horrible home-trimmings to get her hair cut professionally. It didn't make much sense before cos her hair was so pathetically thin and for lack of a better word, sparse. What I used to do was to trim her fringe whenever it got long enough to stick into her eyes.

Lately, the back of it started to grow to reach her shoulders. Plus, it was curling every which way. After the last trimming of her fringe, in which her jerking movements caused my fingers to jerk in tandem and cut a "lobang" in the middle of it, I decided that the next time we'll bring her for a professional haircut.

We chose Little League, located at the exit of the Toys 'R Us @ Forum. When we used to go for Little Gym classes, we would head up to Toys 'R Us for a walk if we have some spare time. I wouldn't have noticed the little saloon at the corner if Faith hadn't been intrigued by the sounds of Barney show playing on the little TV screens attached the base of each mirror.

She dragged me there to watch Barney and while we were standing there, the lady at Little League generously gave a balloon for Faith even though we weren't there for a haircut.

I thought reminding Faith of that little shop corner would illicit good memories of it. Indeed it did. Maybe it was becos I recounted to her, or she did remember it on her own. Faith nodded her head solemnly when I told her that I'm planning to bring her for the haircut @ Little League. She even mimicked me, make snipping gestures with her fingers to her hair, saying: "Cut hair. Balloon."

Worried that she would fuss at having her hair cut the first time, I was all prepared to sit and hold her in my lap. When we reached the hair dresser, she again nodded her head when I asked her if she's okay to sit up on the chair on her own. She allowed the hairdresser to cover her with the cloth and pretty much sat through the entire hair cut without moving or twitching.

Of course, I plied her with some sweets to sweeten the deal. Everything was done within 10 minutes and she was rewarded with more sweets and allowed to choose a sticker from the stacks that saloon had.

It took a little getting used to on my part about her new hairstyle. My mom and Louis thought she looked very nice. More girly too.

Today, I stuck a hair clip on her hair before she went for lessons at JG. Voila, Faith looks like a boy no more.

What does the current hot weather got to do with fears?

Its on everybody's lips. The weather is scorching, hot, humid, blasting, beyond bearable, blah blah blah....

A few friends that I know have recently delivered babies and are probably in the midst of their confinement at home. If one truly believes in all the rituals and list of to-dos when they are in confinement, then, it is going to be a month long of sweltering heat they have to endure.

The reason why I'm writing a post about it is becos it brings back fearful memories of my own confinement, exactly 2 years ago during this period. What my mom calls the period of Qing Ming, where the weather is exactly like what it has been for the last few weeks.

Seriously, I absolutely hate the heat. Other than trips to beach resorts, I much prefer to travel to most holiday destinations in the winter months. There's the rather tedious task of having to slather on lots of moisturisers and hand cream, but its a fair trade-off, I think.

Of course, I'm a most rebellious person. I rolled up eyes at lots of these old wives tales and rituals that I'm supposed to follow. In fact, I was quite certain long before I was expecting that I'm not going to be following lots of these must-dos when my time came. So, here are some memories and also rituals that I boldly flout in my 28 days of confinement :)

#1 - No showers/bathes
One of those big no-nos that all new mothers aren't supposed to do is to shower/bathe. Thankfully, I had a modern and forward-thinking confinement lady. I'm allowed one shower a day, using some herbal stuff that she would boil for me to help dispel any wind or to catch a cold.

Pre-confinement, I would take at least 2 showers a day, even during the winter months I spent in France (which thankfully had mild winters). What more during confinement when your body temperature rises, when the weather was unbelievably hot and the nourishing food you eat helping to up your body temperature some more?

So, once a day, I dutifully and "legally" shower in the mornings. At night, after Auntie retires for the night with Faith, and with Louis' encouragement, I "illegally" shower before I myself turn in for the night.

Lo and behold, my big secret was exposed one night when Auntie unexpectedly came in after she was supposed to sleep, only to be told by a sheepish Louis that I was taking a shower :)

#2 - Wearing of warm clothes
Now this I absolutely had not heard of. The day after I returned from the hospital and right after I had my shower, my mom turned up in the house. And there I was, gratefully fresh and chirpy from the invigorating shower wearing my shorts and t-shirt and my mom was looking at me in aghast. She asked what was I thinking to wear shorts and t-shirt?

Apparently, one must at least wear long pants (gasp!) and cover up to keep warm so as not to catch a chill. Geez, but its the end of Mar and the temperature was soaring! In the end, I took to wearing longer shorts -- those that end slightly above the knees -- or my breast-feeding dresses. I agree upon the prompting of Louis, to wear track pants only before I go to sleep, in the comforts of the air-conditioned bedroom.

#3 - Blow-drying of hair
I'm just not one of those who blow-dry my hair. The only time I'm subjected to it is when I'm at the hair saloon. Otherwise, I would leave it to air-dry. Unfortunately, I did not have the foresight to cut my hair before delivery and it was the few times in my life that I had long tresses.

On the same day that my mom discovered me in my shorts, she was also appalled to note that I had my hair damp and wasn't about to do anything to it. It took many nagging on her part and a little from Auntie for me to eventually blow my hair semi-dry after my morning showers.

#4 - Cold soups
One of my idiosyncrasies about eating is that I hate to drink soup that isn't piping hot. Yes yes, I know its bad for the throat and one might get throat cancer, but like I said, its an idiosyncrasy. In fact, its a pet-peeve when I'm served a less than piping hot soup either at home or outside.

However, with sweat pouring out of every single pore of my body, I ingeniously decided to drink all my soups cold that month. At least, when they cool to room temperature.

#5 - No stepping out of the house
You know, its silly that one can step out of the house to bring the child to the PD or to see your gynae (I had to cos I had an emergency c-sect). Otherwise, one must absolutely not step foot out of the door during the confinement period.

Needless to say, I can boldly admit to going out before the full 28 days were up. There was that night when Louis and I went for Japanese food, and trips to the hair saloon and the spa for a badly needed facial.

#6 - No drinking of water
No, they don't mean for you to die of thirst during that period. Its just that new moms aren't supposed to drink any boiled or god-forbid, tap water. Instead, a nice tea brewed with red dates and dried longans would be made in huge quantities at the start of every day. All new moms are supposed to drink only this red dates & longan tea throughout the day.

I'm not opposed to the tea cos really, its a lovely drink. However, again the heat and the perpetual thirst that I had could only be quenched with good old plain water. As a compromise, I would fill my tumbler with about 1/5 of the tea and the remaining with water. As a further testament of my "accommodating nature", I would dutifully ensure that the water is slightly warm*.

*Note: Theoretically, one's supposed to drink the tea hot, not warm, much less at room temperature.

#7 - Vinegar is good for you
One of the hallmarks of confinement food is the vinegared pig trotters soup. The vinegar, not just any vinegar, but a special type (don't ask me what cos I don't know), is supposed to help dispel any trapped wind in the body.

Literally translated, the phrase "I eat vinegar" in Mandarin is a double-entre that means one is jealous. So, I do not get jealous simply becos I don't eat vinegar. My poor mom slaved for many hours to peel lots of ginger to make me a huge pot of vegetarian vinegared pig trotters. I really did my best to at least take small portions of the soup each time. I don't eat pig trotters either.

So the "spoils" go to other family members, especially my elder BIL and SIL, who loved the dish.

In all honesty, it wasn't a totally horrible month, in spite of the challenges of breast-feeding, hormonal changes, battling of some post-natal blues, post-surgical pain from c-sect and all the challenges new moms face. Its nice to be pampered and treated like a queen from the hubby and family members.

Yet, I always tell Louis that the one single fear that makes me break out in cold sweat each time is that I would have to do my confinement all over again during the same period if and when we have number 2.

Now now, before anyone gets excited about my last statement, please reread the above again carefully, especially the words in bold and italics.

Mummy's little helper? Or not?

I mop. I know. I read. I buy. I busy. I paint. I bathe. I eat. I see. I do. I dance.

Faith's into saying "I <add verb>" these days.

I could be showing my mom something and a little voice pipes in next to me saying, "I see", meaning she would like to see whatever I'm showing my mom.

The three of us and my mom would in the car and the adults would be conducting a conversation. From nowhere, her voice would interject midway into our conversation, proclaiming, "I know...", sounding as if indeed she did know whatever we were talking about.

Or, she would be in her car seat and I would be trying to help her put on her seat belt. Faith would impatiently brush my hands away and say, "I do, I do...".

A few days ago, she was having her bath in the morning and her papa came by the bathroom, asking inquiringly what his little girl was doing. She quipped with a cheeky smile: "I busy! I bathe!".

Yesterday, I was mopping the floor as we were having friends over for tea. She was running circles around me and my pail of mop, frantically begging me, "I mop! I mop! I mop too!"

Some days, she can be hysterically comical, making us laugh, driving us mad or both. Despite all her antics and the throwing of some terrible two tantrums, we can't get enough of her :)

Eczema & anemia

Eczema has always been something that Faith has to content with since young. Her skin requires daily moisturising and I can't get lazy with the application of it or else it would recur. With constant moisturiser after every bath time and at night before she sleeps, we've been able to keep eczema at bay for quite a while until about the time that we brought her out for frequent morning swims.

It was during that period that it flared up in full force, spreading to her usual places like her ears and back of the knees and extending to nearly every part of her body from her arms to her upper thighs. It was so bad that her arms, legs, abdominal and back areas were filled with scratch marks from her incessant scratchings.

Usually for small spots of eczema, we treat it with Desowen for a few days and stop as soon as the eczema is gone due to the steroid content. With the spread of the eczema all over her body, it wasn't feasible to use Desowen, especially for extended usage. I had put her on oral antihistamine as well to aid with the itch.

We went to her PD and she prescribed Physiogel AI, a form of moisturiser that is steroid free. She agreed with me that it wasn't good to apply too much cream with steroid nor give her too much antihistamine.

As we weren't a hundred percent certain that it was just the swimming that was causing her eczema to act up, we decided to also eliminate nuts totally from her diet and watched what she ate.

The Physiogel AI worked wonders. I applied it whenever she started scratching herself. However, it small (50ml) and expensive ($$36/tube). We used it all over her body each and every time she takes a bath and a tube lasts us only slightly more than a week.

I'm not sure if the scratching becomes a habit after a while -- becos she usually doesn't scratch herself unless its really itchy. When I saw that her eczema's gone, I stopped applying Physiogel but continued with her regular moisturiser, applying it as religiously at least 3 times a day. Yet, she started scratching herself again and we had to apply Physiogel on her again. I only apply it to her arms and legs this time, which seemed to be the persistent problem areas.

It is rather distressing to see her scratching herself all the time, seeing her scratch marks marring her baby skin. I felt that there must be a better way to prevent her eczema from recurring over and over again. That got me to start looking at organic and/or natural products, ones without chemicals. I've read that a combination of lavender and chamomile essential oils is good for treating eczema.

For the last week, I've put 2 drops of lavender essential oil (other than eucalyptus, which are the 2 oils I have at home) into her daily bath water. I've also purchased an Avado nappy lotion, which contains mostly plant-derived ingredients and oil. I've used the nappy lotion in place of Physiogel for one application, sometimes, for the entire day, not using the Physiogel at all.

Thus far, results have been small but encouraging. She doesn't scratch as much and the nappy gel seems to work just as well as a replacement for Physiogel. Now, I'm waiting for friends or family to make a trip to Australia. Then, I'll get them to help me top up my essential oils from Jurlique, which is a whole lot cheaper than buying it from CK Tangs :)

Even though the title heading for this post is about eczema and anemia, thank goodness for small favours that Faith is not the one with anemia.

Her papa is the one who always had a little low blood count and is anemic. All his blood tests would invariably show that he's anemic. His latest blood test showed a lower blood count of haemoglobin's. When his doctor was showing us his blood test report, he jokingly remarked that I've not been feeding him well enough.

It may be a joke and he's got a long standing history with anemia, however, he's also recovering from his knee surgery and his health is not quite what it used to be. Even though the doctor prescribed him Sangobion to help with his iron deficiency, my personal preference is to ensure that he gets as much of his dietary requirements through food sources wherever possible.

Hence, I've gone to the chinese medical hall and asked about herbs and soups that are beneficial for him. Two nights ago, I steamed a slice of cod fish (its about the few types of fish that Louis is willing to eat cos he's no fan of fish) and he liked that. Yesterday night, I made "dang gui chicken". I loved it and it reminded me of the dish I used to love during my confinement period. Unfortunately, Louis wasn't a fan of it. He found the smell of herbs too overpowering. Meanwhile, he would be eating lots of spinach and sweet potato leaves as these are high in iron.

I've got some "Ba Zhen Tang" too which I'm planning to boil for him next. It is typically consumed by women to replenish the lost of blood after menstruation, however, the lady at the medical hall said it is alright for him to take that becos of his anemia.

Let's hope my two babies' conditions would improve greatly with my "experiments"!

The scare

Fever. Two weekends in a row.

Louis had some low-grade fever the previous weekend when we celebrated Faith's birthday. We saw the doctor and the latter was not concerned as his injured knee looked alright.

The last weekend, he again had fever. This time around, the fever was much higher - the highest at 38.8C. Again, it didn't abate much even with medications. His left knee swelled quite considerably, looking like a little round ball, giving us cause for concern.

We made an appointment to see his doctor again yesterday. The doctor said that there was some fluid that might caused the swelling. He drew a vial of liquid from the knee -- which was yellowish looking -- and also another small vial of blood. Both vials of fluid were sent for analysis.

The doctor was certain that there was no pus in the fluid that he drew out from the knee. A lab analysis was ordered to determine if there were any micro-organisms found in the fluid from the knee. If there was, Louis would knee to go for another minor surgery to clean the knee.

In the meantime, he was prescribed antibiotics, paracetamol and arcoxial to bring down the swell and we were told to return the next day for a review based on the lab results. The medicine helped considerably. After 2 dosage of it yesterday, the fever went down. This morning, the swelling on his knee went down slightly.

The results this morning when we saw the doctor was a big relief. There wasn't any bacterial or micro-organisms found in the liquid. The blood test result came out alright too, other than the fact that Louis is a little anemic, which he has always been.

He now has to complete the cause of antibiotics and arcoxial. Hopefully, that would help to bring the swelling of the knee back to what it was previously. If there is still any swelling, I gather the doctor will draw out any excess fluid through the syringe.

Whatever it is, this is definitely a much better option than if there were micro-organisms found in his knee, which would require another surgery. Needless to say, after going through all the pain, current ongoing physiotherapy and exercise regime in order to be able to walk with one crutch, Louis is concerned that any surgery would put him back to the state where he was after the knee surgery.

It has been a rather long, arduous, slow and somewhat draining period for him since late December last year. There's a lot of hard work that he needs to put in consistently just to yield a modicum of progress. I guess he's got a lot of self-inflicted pressure to recover as quickly as possible. Unfortunately for the case of a knee injury, my personal sense is that a lot of time and patience is required, especially with the extent of injury he had sustained.

For the last 2 days, the fever and his swollen knee had pretty much zapped him of his energy that he had to rely on using 2 crutches to get around. Thankfully after the start of the antibiotics course, he's now back to using one crutch.

We'll be seeing the doctor again next week for a review. Keeping our fingers crossed that everything will be alright from now on.