Gifts

Since I last wrote in June, work has just been getting a little bit busier. I now travel almost every other week and in days where I am at home, I sometimes work till the wee hours just to get the work done and out of the way.

It is times like these when weekends become even more precious and indeed downtimes like now ( I am writing this in Manila after getting back from dinner and clearing my work), become a time for me to reflect on what keeps me centered and grounded.

When I got into the hotel in Manila this afternoon, I received an email from Eve - pics that she had taken this morning of the two girls. I remember vaguely that I we were trying to make Saige laugh this morning for the camera, but as usual, in my rush, did not have time to see how the pics turned out. As it turned out, the shot was fantastic - not only were the girls smiling, it was so natural and so casual, the lighting was so well composed, it was like a studio shot - even better perhaps.

Which goes to show the miracle of kids. Faith this morning had gotten up quite grouchy and sleepy. You wouldn't have guessed from the broad smile on her face holding up her little sister.

The night before, she had a lecture from daddy and mummy on how disappointed we were in her behaviour for the past few weeks - eating problems and all. When she went to bed, we all hugged and she promised she would be a good girl. Later, before falling asleep, she told me again that she "would be a very good girl for me so that I would not get sad". Such is the innocence of children.

Lately we have had more of these talking sessions with Faith - because lately, she has learnt and been using phrases like "go away" and "I don't want you" in her fits of anger. I believe that fundamentally, Faith has a kind heart and is naturally good-natured. Her spontaneous outburst into dance, her love for music, her hugs when I come back - all these make me believe she is still a young baby at heart. In this baby though, there is now some growing angst - she is maturing - she is able to reason, she no longer cries when she goes to school, and she is now the jie jie of a precocious baby that has just started to crawl, Yet, she is all of 3 years plus and still craves the attention of her parents - one who is distracted with work and the other with taking care of the littler one. Once, when I had a telecon I had to take in the evening, she came into the room and started to fiddle around with the PCs - when I tried to bring her out the room, she was really angry and said she only wanted me to keep her company and she was asking why I was still working (after coming home).

It is true that life is about the choices we make. Overall, I feel the family leads a very blessed and indeed, to some extent, a privilleged life. We never worry about our day to day needs, the kids get the full attention of their mum at home, and our family support from parents of both sides are immense. I sometimes wonder how do working parents cope - if I already feel guilty sometimes with my travels, wouldn't it be worse for families where both parents worked full-time? Then again, I grew up with mum and dad working full-time, but I never felt any less loved..oh well.

When Eve emailed me the pictures this afternoon, she wrote "Lovely shot, darling. ESP like the one of the girls laughing together. So natural, so happy. We are lucky, darling."

Indeed, we are truly blessed.