Faith turns 2

We celebrated Faith's birthday with the extended family on Saturday. There's more to celebrate other than the fact that she turns all of 2 years old.

I have successfully breastfed her for 2 years and would still continue with it until a time where either she or myself decides not to. I still recall how I was so tempted to give up on breastfeeding during the first couple of weeks after she was born due to the difficulties and challenges. I'm glad I persevered. Even now, there's still some people who feel that I should have stopped breastfeeding her long ago, but I try to tell myself (and sometimes tell them too) its becos they do not know the benefits of extended breastfeeding.

Her daddy is progressively improving slowly but steadily by the day. He walks around the house without any crutches, but when he goes out, he still continues to use one -- partly for support and also for those just-in-case moments when its crowded or he's tired.

The only little glitch was that he was having a fever on the day that we celebrated her birthday. A fever that came on on Thur and did not abate even with medication until Sunday. However, nothing was going to keep him away from helping his girl celebrate yet another milestone.

We decided to hold a simple affair at home with the food catered in. Our little extravagance was a 2-tier birthday cake with a Sesame Street theme from Pine Gardens, featuring some of her favourite characters like Elmo, Bert, Ernie and Cookie Monster. The top tier was a black forest cake targeted at the kids (though its not quite a kid's treat given that the cherries were liberally laced with kirsch) and the bottom tier was lychee martini to satisfy the adults.

She had gotten a little bicycle (the ones with a handle at the back for the adults to push) from her grandparents, a Leapfrog Phonics Fridge Magnet from the ACE family, 2 sets of Barbie doll from the grand-aunts and grand-uncles and a Playdoh set from us. Apart from that, Eileen had also given her another Little Miss Sunshine soft toy on Monday to add to her mini Little Miss collection, as well as an Elmo hand-puppet. Given the amount of toys she received, we wisely decided to hold back from opening our present to her and one of the Barbie doll sets.

This year, she was all smiles when everybody sang her her birthday song. Louis had been prepping her for it by singing it to her the few days leading to Saturday. This year, she knew to blow the candles all by herself.

Faith's Dua Peh was filled with pride when she finally acquiesced to allowing him to carry her just before her birthday song was sung. He was absolutely reluctant to give up his perch on the chair with her even though Faith's Dua Erm was shooing him away so that the little family could take a family picture :)

She loved all her presents and she had great fun. We know so becos she said to us while we were turning in for bed, "FUN!" We knew she was referring to the celebration that evening. Even though Faith's not speaking full sentences yet, we absolutely know what she means :)

On Monday, which was her actual birthday, my mom brought a vegetarian fruit cake. We put a symbolic candle on it, sang her another birthday song and let her blow the candle again. She seemed rather thrilled to have us sing her so many birthday songs.

Certainly, our lifestyles have changed drastically since Faith was born. Yet, she's given us so much joy, pride and have taught us so many valuable lessons in life that we just cannot imagine what we would do without her. Like every proud parent, we think our little girl is the best in the world. Or as a friend and I used to say jokingly, "The Bestest"!

Happy Birthday, Little One!

Family dinner and last day of JG semester

Another fulfilling and happy week...:)

1) Faith's JG Mandarin Playclub's 1st semester party

2) Family dinner at Hua Ting

Faith's classes

Two weeks of silence without any post. I'm just plain lazy and procrastinating about putting up a post -- lying in bed with a book feels great most nights. There's quite a bit of stuff about Faith that has happened for the last few weeks, mostly about how much she has grown and her classes.

In about 12 days time, she would officially turn 2 years old. Louis and I still can't believe how fast it has been. Truthfully, the first quarter of her life seemed to crawl by, becoming slightly more interesting when she turned 6 months onwards. The fun really begins around the time she reached 1 year old. That's when time seems to fly, especially when we ramped up the number of classes she attended.

On her classes, there's absolutely no regrets about putting her back into Kindermusik. Every week after class, she happily tells me, "fun", meaning she's had fun and enjoyed her class. Its great that she has a friend to look forward to seeing in class too; Lecia, who's younger than her by about 3 months or so, previously from the same JG Playnest class.

Maybe I'm biased becos I know many kids enjoy music, dancing and singing. However, I felt that for Faith, she's shown much more than the usual interest that other kids display. And becos of her interest in song and dance, its also our strategy to use that to interest her in Mandarin classes.

Its a shame that Louis and I don't speak much Mandarin to her at home. I'm terrible at it and Louis, well... it just doesn't come naturally for us. Following her JG Mandarin classes, I do make an effort to try to speak Mandarin to her. Again, its not automatic, more like we sometimes translate certain words from English to Mandarin, or one or two sentences here and there, whenever we remember.

If anything gets her juice going, its singing and dancing. So, we decided to play children's songs in Mandarin in the car instead of English. Obviously, I'm equally clueless and can't read what are the titles of the songs on the CDs.

Thankfully, its friends to the rescue. Eileen helped me to source and obtained some Mandarin nursery songs and VCDs in Mandarin. So far, we've played one of the music CD in the car and she's kind of enjoying it, learning to sing in bits and pieces for some songs.

Just today, I've finally caved in and bought the from JG the Mandarin CD comprising of songs that they sing in class. Its ridiculously expensive at $19.20 for a CD of just 30 short songs. But its got songs that they sing all the time in class. I figured that the more familiar she is with the songs, the more enjoyable and interest she would show in her classes.

A few incidences had gotten me worried. Perhaps, I'm not being fair becos of the circumstances that preceded her going to class. Nonetheless, its gotten both Louis and I worried enough that we figured we needed to do more to pique her interest in the language and not to let both our own misgivings about Mandarin when we were younger taint her interest in the subject.

We've been regularly going to Safra in the morning, twice a week. Louis would go to the gym while I head to the pool with Faith. As the only service elevator is located nearer to the front entrance of the club, I would usually let Louis off at the front porch, then turn around and park the car before we head to the pool.

Couple of weeks ago, Louis decided to up his visits to the gym, especially after he's been given the go-ahead by his doctor to start bearing as much weight as he could on his recovering knee. To work around Faith's classes, we decided to drop Louis off at the club before I bring Faith for her Mandarin classes on Wednesdays and Fridays. As that's about the time for Faith's afternoon nap, she usually falls asleep in the car after Louis alights.

Lo and behold, when she wakes up from her nap and realises that she's at the JG carpark, she started crying. When I asked her if she's crying becos she doesn't want to go to class, she said "Yes!". Initially, I thought she didn't like the class, but as it happened a few times and we noticed its usually becos I drop Louis off, we figured that she might have thought we were doing the morning drop-daddy-off-and-we-go-for-a-swim routine. Between swimming and Mandarin class, its very clear which is her preference.

The incidence has gotten Louis and myself to start asking ourselves the question, what if she really, truly hates Mandarin? Unfortunately, even if she really hates it, we would still continue to send her for classes becos we are fearful that with the limited exposure to Mandarin she has at home, she might hate it as much as we did in our youth when she finally has to learn it formally in school.

I was talking to a Caucasian mom in Faith's Little Gym class and she was telling me about how she's ensuring that both her kids are being sent for Mandarin classes, despite the fact that her elder son hates it. Thankfully, her daughter, who is Faith's age, enjoys the class.

She's an American who's been in Singapore for the last 8 years and she said to me that she wants her kids to learn a 2nd language and hopes that someday, they would thank her for it. It drives home the point that by Faith's time, it wouldn't be enough for her to command the bad level of Mandarin that we speak and be able to get by, especially not at the rate that China's fast becoming an important player in the global economy. Not when even the non-Chinese are trying to learn Mandarin.

Like it or not, Mandarin classes are not gym or music classes that we would stop if she isn't enjoying herself in class. As parents, it falls on us to make the subject more palatable and interesting to her. So, I'm hoping that music and reading to her would be a good start.

On that same thread, I am regrettably stopping her Little Gym classes and Faith had her final lesson yesterday. We didn't stop it becos she didn't enjoy it. However, her crying incidences at JG's carpark, as well as my reading of the book "Einstein never used flashcards" has made me even more conscious not to subscribe to the Kiasu-parent syndrome and to ensure she has enough time for unstructured play.

Of the three different classes she attends, Little Gym was the most expandable of the lot. With 3 lessons per week, I'm striving to have more free time to bring her to the park, arrange play-dates with other kids or just let her potter around at home doing whatever she likes.

As I'm writing this, I realised that I've not even started about the changes in Faith, e.g. her vocabulary and speech, her antics, behaviour and how she's systematically destroying our once spick-and-span house. I think I'll save that for another day, seeing that my post has winded up being a long one. Not unusual :)

Here's a photo of her taken about one and a half weeks ago. That was the day when I met up with Eileen to pass her some Mr Men books and she in turn gave me the Mandarin CDs/VCDs, Mr Men water bottle and Mr Men t-shirts that she had bought for Faith. Rachel and Faith are both crazy about Mr Men now. She insists on bringing her 3 Mr Men soft-toys to bed nightly and for me to read one of the 46 Mr Men book titles she now own to read to her.

I just couldn't resist having a picture of her posing with all her Mr Men paraphernalia.

The little family of bookworms

These are the reasons why I haven't been regular with my posts.

Books. Borrowed from the library.

Not all of them for me, saved for just 2 titles.

Louis & I have been together for 8 years, of which we've been married for 5 years. In all these time, he's not read a single fiction book from start to finish. In the earlier years when we were dating, I had given him as presents a couple of books from Bill Bryson which I enjoyed tremendously.

Not even for the sake of our courtship days would he read the books that I've given him from cover to finish. Actually, I'm not even sure if he'd even thumbed through a few pages :)

I'm the regular bookworm. Books are where I enter into another realm of fantasy, romance, suspense, travel or whatever, depending on the genre that I'm reading. I'd rather curl up in bed reading a good book to recharge myself for the weekend or to wind down at the end of the day before I turn in.

Louis' idea of recharging himself or relaxing is to go catch a movie, exercise, go out, sleep, or do things that he doesn't have the time to do. In other words, reading was not his idea of fun, relaxation or to rejuvenate, unless you're talking about non-fiction books.

A few weeks ago, while I was nursing and reading to Faith before she turns in for the night, Louis asked if Faith would be distracted if he stayed in the room. I wasn't too sure but I told him let's try it out and see. If she gets too distracted and wants to play with him instead of following her usual bedtime rituals, he could always go out again.

Sitting on the bed while Faith and I are on the mattress on the floor next to him, he was wondering what to do to pass time in the room when he saw a copy of my J.D Robb's futuristic crime book on the headboard of our bed. He picked that up and started reading. And so begin his "love affair".

When Faith finally slept and I was ready to head out with him to the living room to watch some TV programmes like we usually do, Louis' head was still buried in the book. I asked him what he thought of the book and he said it was quite an interesting read so far. And he went on to finish the book over the next few days.

I guess this whole incident of him injuring his knee has led to a surprising discover for the both of us. There are long stretches of time every day when he's lying either on our daybed in the living room or our bed so that he can prop his feet up to relieve the swelling on his knee & ankle -- yes, it still slightly swollen. There's only so much TV programmes or thumb twiddling that he can do, while my mom, Faith & I continued with our daily routines and going to and back from classes.

Encouraged that he finished reading that book, I went to the library and borrowed a few more titles, from different authors that I read and like. Thus far, he's read books by J.D. Robb, Lee Child, James Rollin, David Baldacci & Philip Margolin. These tend to be crime, investigation or thriller types of books.

He's declared that he likes Lee Child's books the best amongst all. In fact, he can't get enough of Jack Reacher, the lead character in which all of Lee Child's books are about. So much so that he's been devouring them so quickly, some of them he's finished in a mere 2 days, that I've been going to the library on a weekly basis to return and borrow new titles.

In fact, my latest "score" for this week was 6 books, of which 4 are by Lee Child. Our library next door has limited titles and I had to venture a little further to Bishan Library cos I figured that it was newer and would have more selections. I was right :)

And so, that's how Louis and I have been spending our nights. After Faith sleeps, we continue to read in the bedroom till midnight. Some nights, like yesterday, when we are coming to the end of the book or when there are parts where the story intensifies, we stayed up until 1 am before turning in. Thankfully, Faith continues to sleep blissfully even when we have the light on.

Its a really nice feeling not to talk or chat but just sit companionably, side-by-side, reading our books in bed. I don't know what it says of us but I don't think its a sad reflection on the state of our relationship that our favourite activity now is to stay up and read our respective books.

I'm thrilled that we can now talk about the characters, plots and style of the various authors that we've both read. We're even excitedly looking forward to the library's reservation notification for when Lee Child's latest book arrives.

As for Faith... I'm glad that she loves her books and wouldn't let me skip her bedtime ritual of reading to her. Some nights, she's insistent that I read 2 books to her or she would scream and cry for me to "Read! Read!".

She's got many favourites, but I think her Mr Men and Little Miss titles are her treasured books. So much so that we've just gotten her the entire collection of Mr Men. Yup! All 46 pieces of them. Its been so difficult to find the individual characters that she loves, e.g. Mr Happy, Mr Bump and Little Miss Sunshine to match the soft toys my friend, Eileen, had gotten her for her Christmas present.

Who knows, we might just turn out to be a little family of bookworms after all :)

Faith in Committee of Supply Debate 2009

Okay, the title is a bit misleading - even after my last post about how Faith is beginning to speak more, she can't still make it in the echelons of the Member of Parliaments or Ministers.

Faith however, got her 1-second mention in a Committee of Supply Debate speech yesterday. Specifically, in A/P Koo Tsai Kee, Minister of State for Defence's, speech.
"Families also give important support to husbands and sons who do National Service. Ms Evelyn Loh is married to CPT (NS) Louis Tan. They have a daughter, Faith. Evelyn tells of how they miss him whenever he goes in-camp. But she is encouraged by the fact that "Louis and his bosses have always viewed NS positively. As a family, we recognise that the adjustments we make during this period are not just good for the country, but good for Louis and for the family". (Link to full speech)

Her second time in a public mention I think. First being in October 2007, in a UK Magazine.

Faith

Faith - Feb 09

We don't know how it happened. In less than 2 years, Faith has grown so quickly to be a young girl who now not just toddles around the house, but who now understands and reacts to us just as if she were an adult.

Faith - then Feb 08

Granted, Eve and I still sometimes have problems deciphering what she wants to tell us. On occasions, when she is playing with her toys, she just points to us and says "Same"- or something like that - leaving her parents very baffled.

Words aside, however, there is no hiding what Faith feels. Whether she is happy, frustrated, scared, contented, helpful, sleepy, participative, sociable or merely wanting to be alone - whatever mood she is in, there is very little now to guess. And that feeling is quite wonderful. When she wakes up in the morning, she shouts out a very nice "Ma-mee" and comes over to my side of the bed to see if "Pa-pa" is awake; in the middle of the night, when she wants water, she just helps herself by standing up, reaching for her water bottle, and then slurps at her straw; when she decides to wander instead of going to sleep, she gets up, slides open the (very heavy door) and then walks out to get what she wants.

Faith's latest toy - drums

With Faith's growth, our roles as parents have also evolved. Where we once used to coddle Faith every single moment, we now let her explore on her own; where we used to want to follow her everywhere she went in case she hurt herself, we now let her go out of the room on her own just because we want to see the proud look on her face when she returns with her "surprise" for us.

And now, instead of doing things "our" way, when we do things as a family, we also now start to give Faith some liberty on what she as an individual wants. From simple things to letting her choose her bedtime story book, choosing what shoes she would like to wear (between the two she has), and her choice of snacks (Nuts or cornflakes?), what Youtube video she would like to watch on our laptop (Elmo, Barbie, Barney, Wheels on the Bus, Mamma Mia, Igglepiggle?), Faith now is given more liberty to choose. Boundaries are of course set - like how frequently she can change VCDs or the Youtube video - we lay the guidelines so she knows what boundaries her decisions need to lie within.

And the more we have given her a chance to grow, we have seen how Faith has started to develop her own values - not just behaviour. Simple things like helping me - she surprised me one day, by bringing my crutches to me (one by one), or even bringing me a tissue when I am eating a banana or even asking me to sit when I go out with her to the daybed from the master bedroom, or wanting to open the two-sides of the door to so I could go in with the crutches, or trying to help me remove my shoes. Some of these no doubt, she would have seen Eve do, and as such, imitated her. But others - like bringing me the crutches - was something that Eve never had to do because I've always been near my crutches. This to me, showed that Faith is now on a higher plane of development beyond just 'baby imitation' - she is now learning how she as an individual can interact with those around her - whether or not she has seen prior behaviour.

And this has made Eve and I very proud of her because I think it signals the confidence that Faith now has - and a level of EQ that will be key for her development. But as you can imagine, it has also made Eve and I very watchful of our own behaviour - without a doubt, Faith's behaviour and values are front and centre those which she will adopt from us and other caregivers around her. So far so good we think.

Here's keeping our fingers crossed.

Towards a better Niu (Ox) Year

Quite frankly, we're not a superstitious or traditional family. As with a lot of traditions, it has been much watered down by our generation. We don't quite know things like the origins of eating dumplings (tang yuan) on Yuan Xiao Jie or staying up as late as we can on the eve of CNY. Most certainly, there's a lot of traditions that we either simply do not believe in or know about to observe.

Nonetheless, Louis and I were just browsing the emails that my elder SIL had forwarded to us recently about feng shui and/or predictions of our Chinese zodiac signs in the year of the Ox. One of the slides caught our attention.

It said that the actual first day of the lunar new year for this year falls on the calendar date of Wed, 4th Feb 09. On this day, it would be auspicious for individuals to be decked out in red, as well as to bank in some money into one's personal savings account to begin the year with a good start.

Supposedly, how the day turns out for your would set the tone for the rest of the year i.e. if the day turns out well for you, the entire would be good and vice versa.

We were jokingly telling my mom about it and I had expected her to laugh it off. To our surprise, she said very determinedly that she would come in red the next day.

For the fun of it, our little family decided that we might try to follow some of the advice given too. There's little harm in any of the things that we do, plus, one can never too much of any luck that we might get for this supposed tough year.

Hence, on Wed, I wore the reddest top that I have -- which actually is against a black background, but its the best that I can do. Louis has no clothes in red, so, he picked one of his t-shirt that had the loudest and brightest red prints on it. Faith certainly has no red clothes either, so she wore a bright pink dress with flowers for her class. I think my mom topped all of us by coming in with a bright red blouse :)

Becos I had to bring Faith for class and mornings are a mad rush for us, I'd asked my mom to bank in Faith's ang paos into her own account. On our part, Louis transferred some money from his working account to a joint savings account in our names -- we're not sure if that counts since we essentially transferring money around different accounts but its the best we can do. I told my mom to put some money into her account too but she told me she would tap her good luck from banking in money into Faith's account?!?! Oh well...

As for how the day went... hmmm.... it was nothing spectacular. Neither did anything bad happen. It was a normal, run-of-the-mill type of day. Which is not a bad thing, I gathered.

So, let's hope we'll be able to go through this year without any mishap like the last one that ended. If you're wondering what that mishap was, it was Louis' knee injury, of course :)